The Product Biz Podcast by Monica Little Coaching

How to stay positive no matter what life, or business, throws at you

January 25, 2023 Monica Little Episode 36
The Product Biz Podcast by Monica Little Coaching
How to stay positive no matter what life, or business, throws at you
Show Notes Transcript

We've all said the phrase "I'll be happy when...." and most of us are living in the state of "I'll be happy when I leave my full-time job" or "I'll be happy when my business makes X amount of dollars" or "I'll be happy when XYZ happens"... but how do we find a way to continue to show up while working towards these goals?

How do we find a way to stay positive during challenges, hardships, and roadblocks, when we feel like nothing is going right and just want to throw in the towel?

In today's Quick Tip Wednesday, we'll be talking about how to stay positive no matter what life, or business, throws at you.

LEARN MORE FROM MONICA LITTLE

Website: www.monicalittlecoaching.com

Instagram: @monicalittlecoaching

My small business: www.shopplantbasedbeauty.com

[00:00:00] Monica Little: Hello, and welcome to this week's Quick Tip Wednesday on the Product Biz Podcast. My name is Monica Little and I'm your host, and I'm excited to talk to you today about how to stay positive when shit is just hitting the fan or even just on a day-to-day basis.

[00:00:21] So this topic came to me when I, last week, was a guest on Dr. Christine Lee's podcast, who you heard on the product this podcast too. She came on and talked about procrastination here on the product based podcast, and then I went and was a guest on her podcast too, and she asked me a super interesting question that honestly I haven't thought of in a while and really made me think of how this could be something so valuable to talk to people and just share my experience and give more insight into this.

[00:00:53] So the question that she asked me towards the end of the interview is, Always been this positive [00:01:00] or where this positivity comes from, and it caught me off guard. And I had to think for a second until I realized where this positivity truly comes from and how it really is like a habit that you have to create.

[00:01:16] And where this starts for me is when I think about when I left my full-time job about three years ago. And I had this idea that when I leave my full-time job and I start working on my own business, I am just gonna be so happy. It's gonna be the icing on the cake. It's just what I need. This is the change that I need in order to be happy.

[00:01:42] And at that point in time, my full-time job, I actually kind of enjoyed it. I had a great boss, I had great coworkers. The work that I was doing was challenging. Some of it I didn't actually love, but at the end of the day, I just, Knew I was meant to do something else and [00:02:00] to do something more, and to do something I was passionate about.

[00:02:03] And I kept telling myself, when I leave this job, when I finally leave this job, when I make enough money, when I muster up the courage to actually leave. When I leave this job, then I'm gonna be happy. Cause I was pretty stressed at my job. It was pretty demanding. I was working 40, 50 hours a week. It was a lot.

[00:02:23] I was managing people, I had a lot of requests. Other people on the team got cut, so I was doing more. And it was just, even though I enjoyed the job, it was pretty stressful for me to be in that position. And what happened is, and how I answered the question of are you always this positive or where does this come from?

[00:02:41] Is the fact. . I placed so much importance on leaving my full-time job in so much of my happiness on that action that when I finally left my full-time job, I was so excited. And don't get me wrong, it is something to be so excited about, something to celebrate, something, to acknowledge that you're [00:03:00] taking a risk, you're going for your own dreams.

[00:03:02] You are leaving what you know to do something that's unknown, that is a fe worth celebrating, right? But what happened for me is two weeks went by after I left my full-time job and I was just excited. Everything was fresh and new, and coming out with a new routine and not having to go to work and being able to do what I wanted to do, it was absolutely amazing.

[00:03:24] But about three weeks into it, when it's no longer shiny and new and exciting and fresh, I realized that I was still the same person that I always was. and I realized that things that used to bother me before continue to bother me. I realized that it wasn't just this happiness that kind of came outta nowhere just because I no longer was at my full-time job.

[00:03:51] I realized that happiness actually comes from within, and that is [00:04:00] the craziest. Phenomena that I went through, and I know I've mentioned this on the podcast before in terms of it's a pretty crazy mind game. , when you expect to be so happy when you leave your full-time job because now you have freedom, now you have time to do what you want.

[00:04:18] And I am so grateful to have left my full-time job, but that doesn't make happiness, right? That act doesn't make happiness because as soon as you put your happiness on a person, a place or condition, you are giving away your power. So if I say I won't be happy until I leave my full-time, I won't be happy until I'm married.

[00:04:39] I won't be happy until I have kids. I won't be happy until I have a house. I won't be happy until I have a dog. I won't be happy until I make X amount of dollars. The truth is, no matter when you actually get one of those things that were just mentioned, yes, there's some excitement, but it doesn't make you happy, and that's because nothing makes you happy.

[00:04:59] [00:05:00] Happiness comes from. and a lot of times we confuse excitement and celebration and change as happiness, but that goes away, right? That after a couple weeks when it's no longer exciting and celebratory and different, now you kind of go back to the same energy frequency that you've always been. So to truly be positive, you have to understand that no person, place, or condition will make me happy.

[00:05:29] And this is something funny that my husband always says he wants to get a dog. And I said, listen, we'll get a dog when we are not trying to fill a do void with a dog, , right? If you are trying to get a dog because you got a stressful time at work and you want a dog who's gonna be happy to see you when you come home, you're trying to fill a void, you're trying to find happiness in a.

[00:05:50] And I wanna get a dog. When we are both so secure and happy in ourselves, our situations, our stress management, then when you get a dog, it's just elevating [00:06:00] everything, right? But to get a dog to fulfill a void is the wrong way around it. Because yes, when you get that puppy, you're gonna be super excited.

[00:06:07] And yes, you're gonna love that dog, but it's not going to bring you this peace internally because nothing external can give you that. Nothing external can give you that piece. It has to come with it from within. So when Christine asked me, are you positive like this all the time? I told her, I'm like, no. I actually used to play the victim a lot.

[00:06:30] I used to complain. I used to blame others. I used to blame my circumstances. I used to say, I'm not smart enough. I'm not good enough. I used to say, why me? Why do all these challenging things happen to me? But then I realized that. Those thoughts are always gonna be there until you physically do something about those thoughts.

[00:06:52] And this is where it gets to be discipline of the mind. You get to control your thoughts. You get to control your emotions. You get to [00:07:00] control how you show up. You get to control how you act. You get to control how you respond. And when you truly realize that is when you can start to show up differently.

[00:07:11] So three weeks after I left my full-time job, I was so excited. I was so ready. I was so grateful, which I still am so grateful. But three weeks later, that's when the real work started. That's when I started to wake up and still feel kind of groggy like I used to when I had my full-time job. That's when I would kind of fall back on bad habits, like browsing social media, comparing myself against others.

[00:07:35] That's when I started to consume more than I would create. That's when I started to just, you know, go back into some of those same bad habits and I realize that no one's gonna save me. Leaving my full-time job didn't save me. Nothing is gonna save me. Only I can save myself. And this is the work that is probably the [00:08:00] hardest of all for no matter what's going on externally.

[00:08:04] To work on yourself internally, to have belief that every single challenge, obstacle, roadblock, hurdle that is thrown my way is for my growth to know that every low point in sales is giving me the opportunity to build sales elsewhere. To know that every time I post on social media and it doesn't go how I want, that's just me learning what to try next to post, to hopefully get the results I do want.

[00:08:30] But being able to be positive and happy and op, op opportunistic throughout all of this is what's truly important. And I'm a big believer that everything happens for a. and it's all for a greater purpose. And I am going towards my path of where I'm meant to be, what I'm meant to do, how I'm meant to impact people.

[00:08:52] And having this deep knowing and belief is what drives me every day. And this helps to take [00:09:00] any situation at hand and for you to realize that everything is working out how it should be, and your reaction is your responsibility. And this allows you to react positively instead of judging yourself or blaming others.

[00:09:14] This allows you to react with emotional intelligence, right? There's so many instances. It's so funny now that I truly, truly have discipline of the mind, and I catch myself thinking these things of where my initial reaction is to be angry. My initial reaction is to get frustrated. My initial reaction is to be stressed, and I have to tell myself, am I choosing to be angry or am I going to choose a different f?

[00:09:38] and then I'll say, Hey, I could be mad right now, but I'm gonna choose not to let it get to me. I'm not gonna give away my personal power. I'm not gonna wait to be happy until X, Y, Z happens. And this is where you start to show up with positivity every single day. So if you are currently [00:10:00] telling yourself, I'll be happy when X, Y, z, I would love for you to stop this and just journal for five minutes, I'll be happy when X, Y, Z and see what comes up.

[00:10:10] I'll be happy when I'm married, when I have kids, when I have more. , and then I want you to really read that list and remind yourself that happiness comes from within. And how can you be happy Now? What can you do today? What small, tiny thing can you do today to find joy in every single day? to bring happiness in every single day and to show up every single day becoming a better and better version of yourself.

[00:10:37] So, I dunno about you, but I decided a few years ago when I went through this to choose happiness and to choose positivity and to choose optimism. And that doesn't mean things have been easy. That doesn't mean there haven't been challenges. That doesn't mean there hasn't been stress. But it means understanding that I can't postpone my happiness until certain things are done and over with.

[00:10:58] I can't postpone [00:11:00] who I'm meant to be until the dust settles on certain things or until I achieve or become or get X, Y, Z. I'm choosing happiness today, and I choose happiness every day. And yes, there are still emotions that come up. But you work through them and you work through them with emotional intelligence to not let it default your entire day off the railroads to the point that the whole day is ruined.

[00:11:24] So I just thought this was something interesting to talk about, and I know this is a quick tip Wednesday when usually it's a business tips, but I think this tip is a business tip because how you show up as a business owner, how you show up as an individual, how you show up as a partner, how you show up as a mom, a spouse, whatever.

[00:11:41] You may or may not. , your business is truly a reflection of you. So you start to see the same mirror of how you're showing up in other places to how you show up in business. And this mirror is your chance to say, Hey. . I acknowledge what's going on internally and [00:12:00] externally in my world, and I acknowledge that I'm going to do my best to be my best, to become the best version of me.

[00:12:08] And I am going to decide to choose happiness in as many situations as I can because I know that no person, place, or condition can bring me happiness. And my happiness truly comes from being at peace with myself and from doing what I said I would do. And. Going outside of my comfort zone and showing myself what is truly possible.

[00:12:31] If this has been a topic that you're interested in, I would a hundred percent recommend for you to get the book called The Abundance Book by John Randolph Price. This is a 30 page small book that fits in your pocket, will fit in your purse, and it talks about how happiness doesn't come from any external situation or external achievement and how it truly comes from within.

[00:12:54] So if this is a topic that resonated with you, if this is the topic you wanna learn more about, I will link that book in the [00:13:00] show notes so you can get your copy. I don't think it's more than $10, and is such an awesome reminder of how we can show up every single day putting our best foot forward to be the best version of ourself.

[00:13:13] I hope you enjoyed this quick tip Wednesday, and I will talk to you next week on the next episode of the Product Biz Podcast. Thank you so much for hanging out with me here inside the Product Biz Podcast. If you love this episode, don't forget to subscribe and to leave a five star review. And if you're interested in learning more about Product Biz Academy, my signature group coaching program for handmade small business owners like you who are looking to create consistent online sales with their business, then go to the product biz podcast.com to join the wait list.

[00:13:49] Doors are currently closed, but you'll be first notified when they reopen. Thank you so much, and I'll see you on the next episode of the Product Biz Podcast.[00:14:00]